DYAC/Drunk texts-Stephafied

I have an android smart phone.  I have to say, it’s pretty awesome and has come in handy on more then one occasion.  Although I refuse to be one of those people who is constantly on their phone updating their shit.  I have better things to do with my time.  I’m also pretty careless with where I leave it sometimes.

Maybe I just don’t want to be found? 

Anyway the website DYAC (damn you auto correct)  is usually full of win.  While I don’t have an iphone (so I can’t screen shot them) I still have that somewhat irritating although occasionally entertaining predictive text/auto correct feature on my phone.  Sometime’s it’s just because I’m drunk…  In any case, I can always e-mail the convo’s and sometimes they have merit.  This is one of those times.

My favorite: Between Adam & I: 

Where do you live now?
Near Montreal pussy station.
Is that a new strip club?  
Ha ha what? No. Oh fucking phone.  No Montreal Ouest, as in the train station.  There is however a strip club up the street.

Between Wayne (my gay boyfriend) & I.  I was trying to convince him to come out to the bar :
Shit sidelines looks busy now lol or is that the whole bar outside lol/
Nope it’s Busty. I mean busy lol.
(Every time I went to type in BUSY, it would auto correct it to Busty)
You are busty lol.
Lol yeah I know
ha ha.
Babe you still awake? come see mrerree!
I am not going out I am hun hunny sorry lol.
I’m sure you are babe but what does the size of your cock have to do with anything? 😉
Not my cock omg hungover helllooooooooo omg lololol. And I am not hung lmfao bahhaha.
That’s not what I heard.

Same night, between Amy & I (I was well on my way at this point, thank God Amy’s a teacher and clearly speaks drunkennease too):
Is it busy and where abouts r u sitting?
It’s busty enough and were buy the frontal.
Near where we were yesterday?
Yeah but closer to the stage, my mom’s preggers spot (was supposed to say preferred).
Ok. Ryan says he knows where u are.
Lol K. Dandra’s here (my sister Sandra)

 

DYAC 🙂

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