{"id":1423,"date":"2011-06-25T14:10:32","date_gmt":"2011-06-25T18:10:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/modologyworld.net\/steph\/?p=1423"},"modified":"2011-06-25T14:11:08","modified_gmt":"2011-06-25T18:11:08","slug":"dear-thieving-assbag","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/modologyworld.net\/steph\/?p=1423","title":{"rendered":"Dear Thieving Assbag…"},"content":{"rendered":"

It has come to my attention that you reached into my account and robbed me to the tune of $490.00. \u00a0Well I got news for you there French fried, welfarian,\u00a0douche-bag,\u00a0ass-hat.<\/p>\n

I\\’m coming for you. <\/em>Never mind the cops, I have my own special brand of justice once I find out who you are, and I will. \u00a0Trust me on that.<\/em><\/p>\n

I\\’m no innocent, but I am sure as fuck not greedy enough to rob people needlessly of their hard earned money. \u00a0I admire\u00a0technology, I embrace it, hell even *I* can respect the fact that with one swipe of a card you can clean out all the account information that\\’s been set forth by trusting souls. \u00a0It\\’s people like you that chip technology<\/a> was created. \u00a0It\\’s not fool-proof but I happen to know exactly where this incident\u00a0occurred, because the same\u00a0franchise\u00a0who\\’s \u00a0apparently too fucking cheap <\/del> not up to speed with advanced technology has allowed this to happen before.<\/p>\n

Except my bank (and most others) are usually on the ball and up to speed about fraud attempts and every single time you or some other\u00a0welfarian bastard who can\\’t be bothered to get a job tries to rob someone, you get stopped before you have the option of stealing from anyone. \u00a0Except this time, temporarily you have won.<\/p>\n

Problem is, you got greedy. \u00a0You\\’re also a fucking idiot who\u00a0apparently\u00a0doesn\\’t have one iota of a clue how to do this. \u00a0Who is dumb enough to use the same bank machine? \u00a0You must be French, English people aren\\’t that dense. \u00a0English people also rarely do business at\u00a0Desjardins in QC because they won\\’t<\/del> rarely serve you in English (this is Quebec after all)<\/span><\/span> You see, there\\’s video footage of you being captured by the machine you used.<\/p>\n

Lot\\’s of it. <\/em><\/p>\n

Why? \u00a0Because you, being a fucking idiot stood there and helped yourself to my account 6 times. \u00a05 of those attempts being\u00a0successful, one of them not. \u00a0My account is not a bottomless pit and I\\’m smart enough to have a limit of $500.00\/day for bank\u00a0withdrawals. \u00a0I\\’m sure you\\’re\u00a0disappointed\u00a0by that. \u00a0 I also don\\’t ever use non TD machines either because the fee\\’s are outrageous. \u00a0At least you had the courtesy to leave me enough money to pay my rent cheque. \u00a0One should be thankful for small favors in times such as this.<\/p>\n

Do you not think that you\\’re not going to get caught for raping my bank account? \u00a0You will and I will rue to see that day come forth, because I am pressing charges against your sorry ass.<\/p>\n

Because I can. <\/em><\/p>\n

So while technology has enabled you to rob me, it\\’s also technology that\\’s going to see you ass fucked for a very, very long time. \u00a0My money has since been returned. \u00a0My bank has me protected 100% for\u00a0UN-authorized usage of my account. \u00a0I also have a new bank card with a shiny new pin number.<\/p>\n

I look forward to the day that you get\u00a0arrested\u00a0for violating me, I also look forward to your court date. \u00a0I plan on being there that day, I want to see who you are. \u00a0You best\u00a0remember\u00a0my face because I know that when I see it, I sure as hell won\\’t ever forget yours. \u00a0No one is going to miss you when I staple your balls to the tracks at the train station and I\u00a0eagerly await the arrival of the train that\\’s going to run your sorry ass over.<\/p>\n

You should also be damn grateful that the only mouth I have to feed is my own, because God help you if I had kids and no bank insurance.<\/p>\n

You\\’d be dead by now. <\/em><\/p>\n

Karma is a bitch and sometimes, her name is Steph. \u00a0Don\\’t forget that either. >_< <\/em><\/p>\n

Love, Steph<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It has come to my attention that you reached into my account and robbed me to the tune of $490.00. \u00a0Well I got news for you there French fried, welfarian,\u00a0douche-bag,\u00a0ass-hat. I\\’m coming for you. Never mind the cops, I have my own special brand of justice once I find out who you are, and I […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[66,64],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1423","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-are-you-fing-kidding-me","category-deep-thoughts-with-steph"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/modologyworld.net\/steph\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1423","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/modologyworld.net\/steph\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/modologyworld.net\/steph\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/modologyworld.net\/steph\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/modologyworld.net\/steph\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1423"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/modologyworld.net\/steph\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1423\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/modologyworld.net\/steph\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1423"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/modologyworld.net\/steph\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1423"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/modologyworld.net\/steph\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1423"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}