{"id":1786,"date":"2012-04-06T20:22:28","date_gmt":"2012-04-07T00:22:28","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/modologyworld.net\/steph\/?p=1786"},"modified":"2012-04-06T20:31:25","modified_gmt":"2012-04-07T00:31:25","slug":"snippets-and-other-misc-shit","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/modologyworld.net\/steph\/?p=1786","title":{"rendered":"Snippets and other misc. shit"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I\\&#8217;m sick. Sick as in I want to crawl into bed and stay there because my head is so fucking congested right now and the back of my throat is so seriously itchy I am thinking about sticking a fork down my throat so I can scratch it. \u00a0Thankfully I could in fact do that, I have no gag reflex. At least not in the traditional sense.<\/p>\n<p><em>That however is a story best saved for another day.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>How did I get sick? My little \\&#8217;boyfriend\\&#8217; (AKA\u00a0favorite\u00a0baby at work, not my actual boyfriend) KG sneezed. In. My. Mouth. \u00a0Last week he was all sick and cranky and he just loves me so of course I pick him up and try to comfort him and that was the thanks I got in return. \u00a0I\\&#8217;ve been fighting it all week, but of course today it hits me like a fucking Mac truck and I feel like ass.<\/p>\n<p><em>Magical!<\/em><\/p>\n<p>So anyway, today being good Friday and all, work was a lot more lax. \u00a0So much in fact that I didn\\&#8217;t have much to do and left before 2pm. That almost never happens as while handy, that\\&#8217;s going to hurt come payday&#8230; \u00a0Anyway instead of doing something useful like cleaning my office or working on my new cake website because that just takes far too much effort&#8230; So I come on here to bitch and whine about being sick and other random\u00a0nonsense\u00a0that spews forth in my mind.<\/p>\n<p>So today, I stumbled upon the following (in no particular order):<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><a href=\\\"http:\/\/www.dailymail.co.uk\/news\/article-2126024\/Christians-NAILED-crosses-gruesome-Good-Friday-enactment-Jesuss-death-Philippines.html\\\" target=\\\"_blank\\\">Christians NAILED to crosses in gruesome Good Friday re-enactment of Jesus\\&#8217;s death in the Philippines<\/a>\u00a0Seriously? WTF is wrong with you people! Granted my thoughts on religion,\u00a0particularly\u00a0the Catholic edition<a href=\\\"http:\/\/modologyworld.net\/steph\/?p=1730\\\" target=\\\"_blank\\\"> aren\\&#8217;t\u00a0exactly\u00a0a secret.<\/a>\u00a0As a member of the modification community, it\\&#8217;s not so much the act of what they\\&#8217;re doing that appalls me the most per se, it\\&#8217;s more so the <em>conditions under which these acts are preformed. \u00a0<\/em>Sterilization, or lack thereof, internal injuries and a bunch of other stuff that makes me shudder inwardly. \u00a0Also it\\&#8217;s 2012, there\\&#8217;s a thing on the market called no more nails!<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<div><\/div>\n<ul>\n<li><a href=\\\"http:\/\/modologyworld.net\/steph\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/04\/no-more-nails-christ.jpg\\\"><img class=\\\"alignleft size-medium wp-image-1787\\\" title=\\\"no-more-nails-christ\\\" src=\\\"http:\/\/modologyworld.net\/steph\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/04\/no-more-nails-christ-225x300.jpg\\\" alt=\\\"\\\" width=\\\"225\\\" height=\\\"300\\\" \/><\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><em>Yeah I know it\\&#8217;s\u00a0blasphemous\u00a0and I don\\&#8217;t give a shit&#8230; \u00a0I\\&#8217;m going to hell in every religion anyway and that happened loooooooooooooong before this post happened. \u00a0<\/em><\/div>\n<p><!--more--><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I love Cracked.com it amuses me generally speaking. Some of their posts are full of suck but some are just too \\&#8217;priceless\\&#8217; to be ignored. \u00a0Especially when they start hating on Cosmo and their<a href=\\\"http:\/\/www.cosmopolitan.com\/sex-love\/relationship-advice\/get-revenge-on-cheaters\\\" target=\\\"_blank\\\"> get revenge on cheaters article<\/a>.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Such as: \u00a0<a href=\\\"http:\/\/www.cracked.com\/article_19066_7-psychotic-pieces-relationship-advice-from-cosmo.html\\\" target=\\\"_blank\\\">7 pieces of psychotic advice from cosmo<\/a>. \u00a0I\\&#8217;d like to get in touch with some of cosmos so called \\&#8217;experts\\&#8217; on body language. \u00a0While some of these things aren\\&#8217;t exactly\u00a0statistically\u00a0inaccurate and are common\u00a0occurrences\u00a0to some degree when it comes to cheating\/lying and guys otherwise being total scumbags; it doesn\\&#8217;t mean that it applies to all men, all the time either. \u00a0Aside from the fact that\u00a0statistics\u00a0are also horribly inaccurate. \u00a0 I know that some of you are reading this thinking \\&#8217;Duh Steph, we already know this\\&#8217; do bear in mind that common sense is anything BUT common&#8230; So I feel bad for the poor hapless bastard that\\&#8217;s stuck with the girlfriend who takes everything cosmo has to say to heart and ends up with a penis drawn on his face with a sharpie&#8230;<\/li>\n<li>Also <a href=\\\"http:\/\/www.cracked.com\/article\/156_7-sex-tips-from-cosmo-that-will-put-you-in-hospital\/\\\" target=\\\"_blank\\\">7 sex tips from cosmo that will put you in the hospital<\/a>. Now I\\&#8217;m reading this and alternating between laughing and thinking about what would happen if *I* was to pull some of those stunts. \u00a0Depending on the circumstances, I tend to forget just how strong I really am, physically speaking. \u00a0So generally I \\&#8217;tone\\&#8217; it done a tad, unless requested to do otherwise when playing with genitals that aren\\&#8217;t mine&#8230;<\/li>\n<li>Also from cracked on a related note: <a href=\\\"http:\/\/www.cracked.com\/article_18450_7-kama-sutra-sex-tips-that-will-put-you-in-hospital.html\\\" target=\\\"_blank\\\">7 Kama Sutra sex tips that will put you in the hospital\u00a0<\/a>\u00a0number 5 amuses me and I am willing to bet that there\\&#8217;s some fool out there dumb enough to try such a stupid thing!<\/li>\n<li>On a final note as far as sex is concerned via cracked: <a href=\\\"http:\/\/www.cracked.com\/article_16675_9-awesome-places-to-have-sex-and-horrific-consequences.html\\\" target=\\\"_blank\\\">9 Awesome places to have sex and the horrific consequences<\/a>. \u00a0This article made me laugh, mostly because I\\&#8217;ve had sex in a few of these places&#8230; \u00a0Done the whole beach thing, eons ago. \u00a0Pool? Check. Mind you it was privately owned, not a public one. \u00a0Car? Yep. Not a moving one mind you but in one, on one during a thunderstorm while on acid. It. Was. Awesome. \u00a0Woods? Done that too! Granted I doubt that the woods in Guelph are full of bears. Mind you there was a ton of bark and dirt in places it shouldn\\&#8217;t have been. \u00a0You know what they missed though? Having sex in a church, behind the alter during your friends wedding reception. (<em>See I told you I was already going to hell<\/em>)<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Another random yet bullshit\u00a0discovery&#8230; \u00a0<a href=\\\"http:\/\/www.mydailymoment.com\/diet_and_fitness\/mindabody\/3_ways_to_make_him_fall_for_you.php?utm_source=DHTMLoutbrainnewrelationships&amp;utm_medium=outbrainnew&amp;utm_term=&amp;utm_content=relationships&amp;utm_campaign=MULTIoutbrain\\\" target=\\\"_blank\\\">3 ways to make him fall for you<\/a>. \u00a0WTF? I barely glanced at it, but since I\\&#8217;m going to talk smack about it, I suppose I should actually <em>read<\/em> it. Makes me even more nauseous&#8230; \u00a0So go read it, it\\&#8217;s brief and my responses to said \\&#8217;tips\\&#8217; will make a lot more sense.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Tip#1: <em>Don\u2019t give a man more than he gives you. <\/em><\/strong>OK first of all, I don\\&#8217;t ask for more than I\\&#8217;m willing to give in terms of an actual relationship. I am however a generous person overall most of the time and I know guys have their pride and blah fucking blah. I am however all for equality and taking care of myself. Don\\&#8217;t pay for a date? WTF is that all about? No one I know is rich for one thing and while it\\&#8217;s always a nice gesture to offer to pay for said date, I prefer for pay my own way. \u00a0Dinner at my house? I\\&#8217;m a Chef FFS, it\\&#8217;s against the rules and everything I stand for to let anyone starve and guys make the most amazing guinea pigs ever!<\/p>\n<p><em>\u00a0<strong>Tip #2: Don\u2019t give away exclusivity if he hasn\u2019t yet committed. <\/strong><\/em>OK I \\&#8217;get\\&#8217; it, but in the same token my mom raised me not to be a whore. \u00a0Chances are if I\\&#8217;m dating you or somehow involved with you I\\&#8217;m likely having sex with you (maybe). If i\\&#8217;m not well that changes everything. \u00a0Going out on a few dates and fucking someone are two different things. \u00a0I don\\&#8217;t sleep around because as I have said countless times before: if something was to happen to me IE: I end up pregnant or worse with an STD, I want to know exactly whose balls I will be stapling to the wall. \u00a0So I will say that I\\&#8217;m pretty exclusive in \\&#8217;that\\&#8217; way at the very least.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Tip #3: Don\u2019t plan dates. <\/strong>OK what? \u00a0First of all, no one that I get involved with is entirely clueless&#8230; \u00a0I don\\&#8217;t function well with stupid period. *If* I was planning on going out with someone, chances are I would ask that person what they felt like doing. Again, I\\&#8217;m all about equality and all that. \u00a0So called control should be balanced in some degree or another. I feel that it should be decided upon both parties what they feel like doing. \u00a0Because chances are he\\&#8217;ll suffer through something that <em>you<\/em> like and <em>he<\/em> can\\&#8217;t stand and it doesn\\&#8217;t kill you to respond in kind&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>That\\&#8217;s my 89 cents for the day!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I\\&#8217;m sick. Sick as in I want to crawl into bed and stay there because my head is so fucking congested right now and the back of my throat is so seriously itchy I am thinking about sticking a fork down my throat so I can scratch it. \u00a0Thankfully I could in fact do that, [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[66,4,58,53,47,12,70],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1786","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-are-you-fing-kidding-me","category-life-as-i-know-it","category-mr-almost-perfect","category-thats-classy","category-there-goes-the-neighbourhood","category-tmi","category-trashy"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/modologyworld.net\/steph\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1786","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/modologyworld.net\/steph\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/modologyworld.net\/steph\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/modologyworld.net\/steph\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/modologyworld.net\/steph\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1786"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/modologyworld.net\/steph\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1786\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/modologyworld.net\/steph\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1786"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/modologyworld.net\/steph\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1786"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/modologyworld.net\/steph\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1786"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}