Category Archives: Dating

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So it begins…

Started my new job yesterday which was interesting to say the least…  Mostly because the guy who was supposed to be training me wasn\’t in due to the flu.  I however have become a little too accustomed to be being \”fed to the sharks\” and adapt pretty damn fast to these situations.  So I was working on the line with the owner last night which wasn\’t all that bad.  Except at first, I had no clue that he was one of the owners oops!  We got on well and rocked it out but the place was a freaking zoo at one point.  Rush from hell kicks in, were SO not prepared for it since we were short people who work during the day to make this whole prep thing happen.  All in all it was OK, it had its moments of total and utter fail but at least we got on well.

Funny enough another one of the owners (I think there\’s 5 of them) used to attend the university I work at and on the occasions that I was working in the actual cafeteria itself as opposed to the kitchen, I\’ve served him before.  So we both thought it was pretty funny that I went from serving HIM coffee, to having him sign MY cheques.  Everyone there is really cool, though.  Were all in the same relative age bracket, everyone is English which is awesome since my French is terrible at best.  So those two things alone make work suck a little bit less.

Of course there are always a few downfalls, as one would find in any kitchen.  The hours, OMFG there goes my life…  Sunday they\’re open from 2pm-1am, Monday-Wed 5pm-1am, Thursday-Sat. 5pm til 4am, yes that would be four o\’clock in the freaking morning!  Guess what shift I\’m working tonight and Saturday…  There\’s a few \”problem area\’s\” that need to be addressed but not so many to the point that I wouldn\’t want to be there unlike one place that I worked at.  So I\’ll be doing my damnedest to make that happen.  John himself said if anyone can whip that place into shape it you lol.  He is right though, years of experience do help and I have reached a point in my career that you know what\’s going to work and what isn\’t.

I have to admit though that the times that I have upstaged them thus far, they\’re pretty good about it.  Yesterday being a prime example: you work in any kitchen that has a grill and you\’ll know what I mean.  Each one has a drip pan underneath it that generally slides in and out.  Most places cover this with tinfoil because when your grilling chicken, the oil in the marinade tends to catch on fire.  However I was told that it was broken, I was like broken?  Dude its a drip tray, how on earth can you break that?  He said that its been jammed in there all day and no one could get it out.  That was until *I* came along and yanked that sucker out in all of 2 minutes.  I\’ve never seen a  bunch of boys so excited over such a  thing!

Tonight pending the exec Chef comes in, it should be interesting.  I like him, he\’s nice enough BUT he\’s also a recent graduate (class of 2008) and I also happen to be a few years older then him and he\’s a little cocky, but too much so.  Needless to say, we\’re going to be having a discussion today if he comes in.  No its not *my* kitchen, and I am OK with not being anywhere near in charge for a change but certain things just don\’t sit well with me for justifiable reasons.  Mostly I get into \”anal retentive Nazi\” mode when it comes to organization, cleanliness, food safety and efficiency.  Those are the 3 key areas that I always find need to be addressed to some degree or another.  Not that I\’m saying that my new job has a profound amount of those issues thankfully, it just needs \”the Steph touch\” 😉

Its a HUGE change from the life I have grown somewhat accustomed to and my schedule and its time constraints tend to turn people off more often then not.  Not that I can say I blame anyone for that because it takes a pretty tolerant person to date someone in this business.  The hours are insane, its stressful, becoming an alcoholic is always an issue (thankfully not for me, that\’s why I don\’t drink that much), its very demanding overall and you tend to become exceptionally bitter and jaded at best.  In any case I consign myself to the fact that I\’m getting out sooner as opposed to later.  I signed up for this life, it was my choice and like several other things I choose to do, you can either take it or leave it.  Not like it matters, since the last few dates I have been on haven\’t been all that remarkable.  I have a few ideas as to why, but mostly people automatically assume that because I work as much as I do, with the most random schedule ever that I won\’t have time for them.

WRONG…  I ALWAYS make time for those that matter.  Granted I can\’t bet here for everyone 24/7 but I sure as hell don\’t expect them to be there for me that much either.  Which makes the time you do have with them that much more precious.  It also makes dating someone who\’s in the same industry as you a hellish nightmare at best…  But its been done and if I was destined to, I\’d do it again.  Not that it matters because the last few have totally lacked the whole wow factor for lack of a better term.  I don\’t know if its one situation that I can\’t seem to let go or if I\’m just dead inside.  At this point its anyone\’s guess and there\’s only one way for me to narrow it done, but I have to nail down that one opportunity first to see.  Which very well might never present itself at this rate.

In other non work related news: I booked my ticket to go home and my annual Christmas tattoo appointment as well 🙂  Now I just need to take the time off of work.  I\’m hoping that won\’t be an issue…  I\’ll only be gone for a few days, I leave the morning of the 24th @7:30am and I have to leave Cambridge on Dec 28th @ 9:30pm to make my connection in Toronto for 12:30am the following day.  But it\’ll be nice to go home & see everyone and get my memorial tattoo for Jason as well (which in case you were wondering is booked for 3pm on the 28th YAY!).  If  your wondering what I\’m getting,  I\’m keeping a closely guarded secret.  Only one/perhaps 2 people know what I\’m getting and even Tim doesn\’t know yet.  I just said that I\’m getting a memorial piece and nothing more.  I\’m excited though!  I was going to get Gil to do it a few months ago but I thought better of it and decided to wait until I went home instead.  I need a little more time to heal and the tattoo usually helps, but in the end there\’s no point it rushing it either.

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Randomness!

Start my new job on Wed, have Friday off and a whole lot of crazy insane shifts to look forward to, YAY!  Went shopping today and got the most adorable red wool jacket EVER and I LOVE it!  Along with some other nifty stuff that I don\’t feel as compelled to mention.

I\’m also pondering a decsion of sorts in regards to someone…  But yet I still can\’t seem to totally make up my mind just yet but I\’m thinking if something doesn\’t happen and soon, that\’s going to be a total deal breaker.   Part of it *isn\’t* \”control-able\” due to schedule conflicts and what not but still after a while the whole \”good things come to those who wait\” tends to loose its luster.  I do give them credit for trying at least!  Yet in the same token to coin a phrase from the song (which adds a touch of irony to the situation for reasons I won\’t disclose) beautiful by the smashing pumpkins:\” And I\’m sure you know me well, as I\’m sure you don\’t.  But you just can\’t tell, who you\’ll love and who you won\’t\” .

Which you know it\’d be nice to even have a minuscule amount of say over who\’ll you\’ll like, never mind love.  Aside from the title, another line  from this song also rings true (for a few different reasons): \”Don\’t let your life wrap up around you, don\’t forget to call whenever. I\’ll be here just waiting for you, I\’ll be under your stars forever.  Neither here nor there, just right beside you.\” Carrying on with the whole sappy factor, I adore this song too: by starlight

So enough of the sappiness from me… If your all wondering what in God\’s name has gotten into me, I really have no idea either!

So moving along in other news, since I\’ve been trying to stay up super late in order to get accustomed to my new shift(s) and in doing so have been trolling the internet for something to amuse me and well needless to say, it hasn\’t dissapointed me!  I really have to give the most credit to MILA (my life is average) and thanks to David who told me about it in the first place.  Because occasionally people will post random websites on there and of course I have to go and check them out because well why not?  Along with MILA …  FML (fuck my life) has some odd bits of humor as well.  Let\’s not forget texts from last night (TFLN) which also has a few gems!

Then I discovered: Cracked (which is full of funny off beat humor), not always right (as in the customer!) hilarious if you ever worked with the public!  Thought I would share that with you all 😉

Random MSN tidbit that I happen to think is funny in regards to a certain recent situation:

Steph: \”I told my mom (left out some details *I DON\’T tell her EVERYTHING but this was just too damn funny NOT too!) and she was laughing so hard she was in tears!\”

C:\”he could have asked for a few tips, since I bet youre quite skilled in bed\”

(Why yes, as a matter of fact I am, thanks! haha)  No in case your wondering, nothing happened and no I didn\’t get any recently.

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Bittersweet endings, F.A.I.L, epiphany\’s & other things…

Wow, that\’s really all I have to say for the moment…  What a strange week its been around here!  Where in God\’s name do I start?  There\’s lots that\’s totally worth mentioning so be prepared for one long ass post.  I suggest you grab some popcorn and get comfortable lol.

So lets backtrack just a little bit here…  A couple of weeks ago I sent a text message to someone at random and got a reply back saying \”I thought you weren\’t talking to me anymore\” all because of something I had posted via my twitter newsfeed .  Which was (I\’m assuming) something to do with my \”date\” with Ian.  OK first of all, I answer to NO ONE; that should be established from the get go.   So to sum that up, if I\’m NOT your girlfriend then really I have no claims to you and you have zero claims to me.  Regardless of how much I may/may not like you, that\’s irrelevant if you drop in and out of my life like a damn yo-yo.  I don\’t care how busy you are, *if* I matter that much to someone, find the time.  It only takes a minute to at least make the effort even if its only a simple text message.

I get busy too, but I still put forth the effort, especially now.  You see I felt still feel guilty (a little less so now) when Jason died for not being there.  Mostly because I was a little too wrapped up in my own life to be there for my friend and now he\’s gone and I miss him dearly.  Maybe that e-mail wouldn\’t have made a difference and I\’m pretty sure it wouldn\’t have but at least I would have known that I had put forth the effort to let him know that I was there and that I still cared.  Now I can\’t do that anymore and its still very heartbreaking.  In any case, I\’m still \”free\” to do what with whomever I choose seeing as how I highly doubt at this point that anything will ever come out of the situation that I\’m referring to.

Even if I would prefer that it did (which I am not discussing)…  You never know.  Bottom line is this: I don\’t think its fair for someone to expect me to put my life on hold for them because they\’re too busy for me right now.  Yeah I get that work can be a time whore, but if you treat me this way now; how much of a difference would it make *IF* I was in fact that persons actual girlfriend?  That\’s crossed my mind on several occasions in spite of that strange hold they have over me…  You snooze you loose!  Should have made the time if you end up missing out, at this rate I DON\’T see that happening.   But still, if it does, they have no one to blame but themselves.   How is this relevant to what I\’m about to post?  You\’ll see in a minute, I\’m getting to that…

So in my quest for a new job, which was an epic pain in my ass I finally nailed one!  I was starting to get a little concerned about that whole situation since I\’d sent out countless (read 45) CV\’s and didn\’t get a call back and for the life of me couldn\’t figure out why not…  Then it dawned on me, all of my job titles were \”higher\” up positions as in executive Chef, sous Chef and so forth.  Whereas most people are hiring cooks.  Yes there is a distinct difference between the two.  Mostly skills, qualifications, education and experience.

So I \”dumbed down\” my job titles and then all of a sudden, I become miss popular and people started calling THANK GOD!  Anyway had a job interview on Tuesday, job trial for said place on Thursday and got hired YAY!  I don\’t think I start until Monday, waiting for that ever so elusive e-mail from the new boss to let me know!  No more getting up in the morning for me!  Although some of those shifts fall into the \”relationship killer\” category I\’ll deal.  That\’s the life of this industry and few understand it unless you\’ve been a part of it before.

So Friday was my last day at Gryphon and its ending was bittersweet to say the least.  I met lots of great people & made some fabulous friends along the way while I was there.  But alas my employment there was not meant to be for a number of reasons, none of which I am going to disclose, since most people that I physically talk to already know.  In any case I had a long talk with my former boss and left on a positive note. Which was nice, its not that either she or myself are bad people.  I learned a lot and there were times when she really helped me out and I never forgot those times.  So in spite of how I left, I still went out and bought her flowers just to say thank you.

In the end, Jason\’s death affected me in a number of ways that I didn\’t even take into consideration.  So needless to say, things are going to change.  Hopefully for the better, perhaps not but I\’ll never know if I don\’t try.  Its been almost 2 months now since he\’s been gone and it still hurts but not nearly as bad as it once did which is something I\’m eternally grateful for.  I\’m pretty sure I\’ll always be emotionally retarded over the whole thing seeing as how his death was just so damn senseless!  But in any case, his death really made me re-evaluate a lot of things and put them into perspective for me.

So the other day I was getting waxed & I jokingly mentioned that I had a hot date on Friday ( I actually had a party to go to).  She says oh your single? Then we got to talking about random things associated with dating and what not.  I didn\’t think much of it until someone passed a message onto me that so & so wanted to speak with me and could I please come in when I had a free minute.  I looked a little perplexed because its not as if my cosmetician and I have any type of \”relationship\” outside of pedicures and getting waxing done.  So I went in there, and joking said what are my eyebrows going to fall off?  She pulls me into the back room, says she has a favor to ask.  Long story short, a member of their family needs residency and wants ME to marry him so that he can stay here.  On paper only of course but its not that simple.  Granted I knew little about the immigration process until Carly moved to VW to be with her beloved.   In any case I know enough now to know that unless I actually want to be with someone that bad, its really far from worth the risk/responsibility/headaches that are associated with such matters.  Needless to say, that was really random & totally odd!

So let\’s talk about this whole dating thing now shall we…  I went out last night and later on someone came over.  Doesn\’t totally qualify as a \”date\” per say, we just hung out and watched a movie.  No in case any of you are wondering, I didn\’t get any…  As much as I would LOVE to divulge the details of one rather amusing (to me at least, hugely embarrassing for him) incident I won\’t because well, its just mean to do so.  However if you really want to know, feel free to ask and I will spill (no pun intended)! So I thought I should compile a list of things that have happened/been said throughout the years that would likely fall into the \”dating don\’t category\” so read on kids, because this might save your ass and/or your date with someone.  Even more so if your going on a date with me 😉

  1. Its very sweet of you to compliment my tattoos.  However telling me if I was your girlfriend that you would love to spunk all over them isn\’t exactly cool.  I really, hate being jizzed on!  I don\’t like anything sticky for that matter.
  2. Have some sense of self control.  Apparently I\’m pretty exciting to be around, but please try to contain yourself.
  3. If you think there\’s a possibility that you might get laid & might not be able to withstand yourself for more then 5 seconds…  Jerk off at home, not in my bathroom!  Yes WE do notice these things, especially when you miss.  Thanks…
  4. Asking your date if you have condoms and when the reply is yes (most of us are responsible and prepared for just about anything, after all were woman) throwing your fist up in the air and screaming YES!!!!!!!!!!! Is NOT acceptable… EVER
  5. Yelling oh no stop, oh shit that was bad isn\’t cool either.  Especially when we\’re right in the middle of something.  Makes us wonder what on earth your problem is/what were doing wrong!
  6. Have a clue about how things work please!
  7. Virginity, chances are were not going to care if your a virgin (well I at least don\’t but seeing as how I\’m 31 chances are you\’ll be in my age range and I will start to wonder) because its good to know!  Not only would we be the ones taking your \”V\” card, we wouldn\’t make fun of you for lack of experience either.  Because we will, that\’s just how it works.
  8. Don\’t ask us to call/text you and then proceed to blow us off when we do, ignoring us won\’t work!
  9. Relationships are like shopping for say a house or a car, we\’re going to shop around for the best option in this case and that may not be you.  However its always best to establish exactly what your after BEFORE we allow you into our/your bed, let alone anywhere else for that matter.   That goes both ways of course.
  10. Pointing out that you have a raging hard-on and have every intention of jerking off when you get home.  That\’s on a need to know basis and guess, what?  I DON\’T need to know thanks!

I could go one, but suffice to say I\’m sure I\’ll find something to add to this list later on.