Category Archives: Work

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My latest rant and an e-mail to share

You know I really loathe and despise when people come into my restaurant and claim that they have allergies to something random like onions. Please! You honestly think that were dumb enough to buy into that bullshit, a simple no onions please would suffice. Yes of course there are people in the world whom I am sure allergic to onions and such but NOT that many people!

When your throwing your garbage out, get a fucking clue! If it\’s over flowing, move your lazy ass onto the second one located a mere half foot away from the other one. When i\’m changing the garbage don\’t fucking line up behind me to wait, or attempt to throw your garbage in there when there isn\’t a bag in it either. Yes one of the hydro guys were about to do that, these people are supposed to take care of my hydro? Really not comforting, not in the least! Also jackass don\’t waltz in my restaurant 5 minutes before closing an expect to sit there and fucking eat! Yes my french sucks ass and I\’m sorry but I do try. However don\’t sit there and chew my ass out for it!

So moving along, I got this great e-mail today and feel the need to pass it on because it is a gem!

Dear Employees:
It has been brought to management\’s attention that some individuals
throughout the company have been using foul language during the
course of normal conversation with their co-workers. Due to complaints
received from some employees who may be easily offended, this
type of language will no longer be tolerated.

We do, however, realize the critical importance of being able to
accurately express your feelings when communicating with co-workers.
Therefore, a list of 18 New and Innovative \”TRY SAYING\” phrases have been
provided so that proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in
an effective manner.

(1) TRY SAYING: I think you could use more training.
INSTEAD OF: You don\’t know what the fuck you\’re doing.

(2) TRY SAYING: She\’s an aggressive go-getter.
INSTEAD OF: She\’s a fucking bitch.

(3) TRY SAYING: Perhaps I can work late.
INSTEAD OF: And when the fuck do you expect me to do this?

(4) TRY SAYING: I\’m certain that isn\’t feasible.
INSTEAD OF: No fucking way.

(5) TRY SAYING: Really?
INSTEAD OF: You\’ve got to be shitting me!

(6) TRY SAYING: Perhaps you should check with…
INSTEAD OF: Tell someone who gives a shit.

(7) TRY SAYING: I wasn\’t involved in the project.
INSTEAD OF: It\’s not my fucking problem.

(8) TRY SAYING: That\’s interesting.
INSTEAD OF: What the fuck?

(9) TRY SAYING: I\’m not sure this can be implemented.
INSTEAD OF: This shit won\’t work.

(10) TRY SAYING: I\’ll try to schedule that.
INSTEAD OF: Why the fuck didn\’t you tell me sooner?

(11) TRY SAYING: He\’s not familiar with the issues.
INSTEAD OF: He\’s got his head up his ass.

(12) TRY SAYING: Excuse me, sir?
INSTEAD OF: Eat shit and die.

(13) TRY SAYING: So you weren\’t happy with it?
INSTEAD OF: Kiss my ass.

(14) TRY SAYING: I\’m a bit overloaded at the moment.
INSTEAD OF: Fuck it, I\’m on salary.

(15) TRY SAYING: I don\’t think you understand.
INSTEAD OF: Shove it up your ass.

(16) TRY SAYING: I love a challenge.
INSTEAD OF: This fucking job sucks.

(17) TRY SAYING: You want ME to take care of that?
INSTEAD OF: Who the fuck died and made you boss?

(18) TRY SAYING: He\’s somewhat insensitive.
INSTEAD OF: He\’s a prick.

Thank You,

Human Resources

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Its been a while…

And it will continue to be a while because I am without a PC dammit! I am also boderline poor at the moment, so I won\’t be able to up-date for a while. I am going home for christmas though so I can use my mom\’s computer thank God!

Anyway in the meantime, happy holidays to all of my readers regardless of how you celebrate it!

Get smashed, enjoy the snow and irritate your friends by buying them sex toys 😉

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Bring on the hatered!

So Sunday I have a \”discussion\” with my boss…

He wants me to do more!!!!! WTF, I DO EVERYTHING as it is, do you want my left fucking arm too while your at it??????

So they finally discovered that I know how to cook, so they want me up front at all times doing the set-ups and what not. I was told by 2 different managers not to do any cleaning IE: the floors and things because we hired a new guy to do all that stuff! So what do I do? Don\’t do it lol.

What happens because of that? He calls one of the owners and cry\’s to him and wanted me fired because I didn\’t clean the floor when I was TOLD NOT TO! Seriously what the hell is wrong with people! Granted we have some serious cultural differences which are creating obvious conflicts. He keeps fishing for excuses to get me to do more work without actually getting paid more yet he dangles the proverbial money carrot in my face ALL the time. I ain\’t buying into that BS, no thanks jackass, get a clue then we\’ll talk some!

So after I found that out I started looking for a new job, spent 1/2 hour on the phone with the exec Chef of a better paying restaurant who\’s looking for head cooks and he seems impressed with me, he actually said as much. So Monday I go for an interview, keep your fingers and toes crossed for me!

Also one of the chef\’s at work has taken hitting on me too far! Can we say sexual harassment. He grabbed my ass, finds ANY excuse to rub up against me and has been calling me honey all day.

Good, I can go after them when I quit! My PC has the speed of a snail these days so I can\’t up-date much until I install more ram.

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Feel like eating out tonight? READ this FIRST!

The next time you\’re out eating at a restaurant, look at your server. Do you think they are really happy to be doing that job? The answer is no, they are not, but it\’s what we do, and we do it for the money so please help them out. Its a tougher job than you think and you should pay them accordingly!

There are SO many people out there flooding the restaurants w/o any knowledge of how to tip. Here is a short guide for the general public to follow. Feel free to print out and store in your wallet and/or purse.

1. CHILDREN \”THE LITTLE DEVILS\”: If you have children, DO NOT let them, open and dump anything on the table (ie; salt, sugar, etc). IF YOU DO, you must leave an extra $5 for the server to clean up YOUR CHILD\’S mess & to restock the now unusable wasted items. We are neither their babysitter nor their parent. The least you can do is pay us for the extra work. Also make sure you control your kids and don\’t let them scream or run around the restaurant. It\’s very distracting not to mention dangerous if they get ran over by a server with hot food in their hands.

2. \”THE CAMPERS\”: If you feel the necessity to stay for longer than 15 minutes after you pay, its an extra $3 every 30 minutes. We make our money from the tables. If you are in one and we can\’t seat it, we don\’t make money.

3. COMPLIMENTS: Telling a server they are the best server they\’ve ever had is not a tip. If we are good, let us know by leaving us more money. We cant pay our bills on compliments. Its not that we don\’t appreciate the praise, its just that if you say that and then leave 10% it\’s an insult.

4. THE SALVATION PAMPHLETS: Prayer cards and any other religious pamphlet is NOT a tip. It is insulting that you assume we are w/o religion and must save us. Again, like ..3, we cant pay bills w/prayer cards. We\’d go to church on Sundays if it wasn\’t mandatory to work on Sundays because EVERYONE who goes to church follows it by eating out.

5. TIPPING: It is not 1960. Cost of living has gone up dramatically since then. 18% is the MINIMUM amount of what you should be tipping your servers. Just look at the tax line and multiply by 2-3, this gives you your minimum tip amount. Remember, our companies pay us minimum wage (minimum wage for servers is $6.75 in CA, $3.13 in FL, $3.09 in IA, $2.13 in TX) And we are taxed on 10 percent of your meal automatically anyway. So if your meal is $100 and you leave $10 and we tip out $4-5 to the busser, bartender, and whoever else then we pay tax on 10 dollars and we make $5. It seems small but it adds up. How many times do you eat out per week and do this?

6. THE COMPLAINERS: If you get a discount because of your food was prepared wrong or something, do not take it out of our tip. We didn\’t cook it. The cooks get paid hourly regardless if the food sucks. However, we only make what you give us.

7. THE FREE STUFF: If you happen to get anything for free and you did not have a problem with your dining experience, most of the time it is because the server thinks you will realize that they are giving it to you for free. There should be extra tip thanking the server for the free item. They could get in a lot of trouble giving away free stuff. You should give them hazard pay for it.

8. THE LATE ONES: If you come into the restaurant 10 mins before closing or any time near closing hurry up and order your food and get out. Closed means closed, not social hour. It is so rude to sit there and take your sweet ass time. We can\’t leave until you leave because we have to do side work and clean the table you are sitting at. We don\’t want to stand there waiting for you for an extra hour just because you don\’t want to go home. We recommend 24 hour establishments such as Denny\’s if you wish to sit into the wee hours of the night.

9. THE TABLE HOGGER S: If you only come in for coffee or a dessert, to do paper work, or to have a meeting, don\’t sit there taking up our booths for hours. We are not Starbucks or a hotel restaurant. If you want to sit for hours, go there or else you better leave a good tip for us and camping fee included.

10. THE GREET: When we come up to the table to greet you and we ask how you are doing please let us know. We honestly want to know how you are doing. If you are in a bad mood we want to know that from the beginning. A confused stare or complete silence does not suffice as a reply to \”How are you doing?\”. Also most of us are REQUIRED to say certain things during the greeting, so please don\’t interrupt our greeting and say \”I want coffee\”, \”Can we get some bread?\”, or \”What are the soups?\”

11. THOSE DAMN CELL PHONES: Don\’t ever talk on your cell phone in a restaurant. This is probably the rudest thing to do. If you must be on your cell, at least keep your voice down in respect for other customers. If you are on your cell phone when we walk up to greet your table we will walk away and not return until you get off your phone. Just show some respect and give us your attention for a couple of minutes.

12. TAKE-AWAY OR TO-GOS: Always remember to tip the take-out order servers! They work just as hard as a server, and hardly ever get tips for it! WE DESERVE TO BE TIPPED TOO!

RESTAURANT WORKERS READING THIS:
Please repost this so the word can get out, since so many people are uneducated about tips and our lives depend on this – at least for now……