Thanks that was fun…

Don\’t forget, no regrets…  I just happened to have that song stuck in my head, and in a way it somewhat applies I guess for the most part in a round-about-sorta-way…  With the exception of \”I thought that you would be begging to be with me. I’m the one on my knees, blubbering,
\”please, let me stay\”.
\”  Cos well I don\’t/won\’t do that…  EVER…  Granted I have had people begging to be with me because well I am awesome 😉

Yeah that was totally random in a way but in another way I can\’t entirely divulge what exactly I\’m talking about/referring to mostly because I\’m not 100% certain myself… lol  In a way I\’m putting my foot down in regards to certain things.  In some ways I feel like a dog that chases its tail but in the same token I can\’t get pissed because I\’ve been SO damn sick lately and really, really angry!  I managed once again to get myself into one hell of a really bad situation that\’s bound to be FULL of absolute FAIL…  We\’ll see how it all works out in the end though I guess.  At least I know where I stand with some people and well that\’s better then nothing I suppose right?  Needless to say the way that some people handle certain situations serves as a shining example of things to come!  I just hope that they keep that particular fact in mind…  Someone\’s going to win and someone\’s going to loose and I have a feeling that I already know who that is… One can never truly know until it happens, and maybe I\’ll surprise myself…

*I can only imagine the assumptions that some people are going to arrive at while reading this, in any case don\’t assume that its about you because it very well might not be, but it just very well may be about you, you\’ll never know.*

So anyway time to turn the page and move on to more randomness that\’s my life…
Bathroom is painted and partially decorated.  Of course the previous decor just didn\’t fit in with the current color so that had to be changed.  Now I have to play the waiting game because I ordered 8×10 prints of my own work that I altered in paint-shop pro to \”appear\” as if they\’re already matted and well to just add visual interest as opposed to having the entire image fill it.   They won\’t be ready until Monday which is also thanksgiving day which means that *I* get a PAID day off of work, excellent!  Not sure if the place is actually open or not, but perhaps it is.  I hope so, because its making my OCD go a little insane 😉

I\’ve come to the conclusion that my kitty affectionately known as Mrs. Kitler isn\’t anorexic, I think she just hates her food or maybe she hates her new brother…  She hasn\’t eaten SFA in DAYS and even though she was a total fat ass, she\’s lost a little too much weight and I was starting to get concerned.  I can\’t \”free feed\” her like I was doing because Xavier is a total pig and eats his food and then her\’s too!  So that poses a bit of an issue because I can\’t drag her off into my room or something to ensure that she\’s eating.  I would hate to have to send him back to the shelter but it looks like I may not have a choice in the matter.  After all Heddy got here first and she\’s my baby!

I had a job interview yesterday, went OK I guess.  The executive Chef is super nice and the money is AMAZING!  So that would be exceptional but I\’m never that fortunate so I\’m not getting my hopes up at this time.   Because well that\’s just foolish and all now isn\’t it?

And i\’m done…

Its official, I HAVE reached my breaking point as of right now!  I mean seriously, I just want to curl up into the fetal position in a padded room and scream!  I\’ve been saying for years now that I need HAVE to not be a Chef anymore…  After today the more I think about it, the more it needs to happen.  My boss has some serious issues with communication, I mean really.  Its one thing to rag on me for something I DIDN\’T do or have the audacity to say to me I told you that earlier when in fact it WAS my co-worker, NOT her in a snotty ass bitchy tone.  That, I can\’t handle that!  There\’s no damn way I can take her, this industry and the reams of BS that come with it!

I\’m pretty sure that I\’m going to unjustly get fired from my job because my boss refuses to acknowledge when she\’s wrong or when she\’s convinced in *her* mind that I didn\’t do something or her new favorite pastime, writing me up for something that she told me ONE time to do and I forgot or it wasn\’t done when SHE wanted it done without taking into consideration what I need to get done in the morning with only ONE hour to get it done.  So yes please pile more work onto my ass because you assume that I don\’t manage my time properly or something…

No I\’m not perfect and contrary to her belief, I AM mature enough, responsible enough to in fact take responsibility for my OWN ACTIONS!  She however can\’t…  Tells ME that *I* don\’t communicate enough but when anyone attempts to, she doesn\’t fucking listen and argues with you to the point that you want to stab yourself in the face due to extreme frustration!  I don\’t give a damn if your the one who signs my cheques, if you don\’t provide me with the necessary tools to do my job I can\’t make it happen!  I am not a mind reader either, I posses numerous gifts but that\’s NOT one of them!

That being said I applied for a bunch of jobs yesterday…  Got a few phone calls back today but there\’s only one that interests me at the moment.  One of them didn\’t even bother to leave me a voicemail, oh well c\’est la vie…  I\’ll see what happens, because I need to get out of this industry right now.

So I was thinking that

maybe I should buy a helmet for all those occasions that I want to bang my head against the wall.  I find myself fighting that urge more and more and I ask myself do these people not realize how foolish some of the things they say really are?  Reminds me of a line from a suicidal tendencies song:\” silently screaming as I bang my head against the wall.\”  Everyone has those moments where the most ridiculous thing flies out of your mouth without even thinking about it, yet when you converse with someone daily and it seems to be a regular occurrence you almost want to smack them.   Almost makes me wonder what in the hell I was thinking when I met them 2.5 years ago…  Let alone what I seen in them in the first place…  Actually I already know the answer to that question & its almost shamefully shallow…  At the time though, it was totally worth it!  Now not so much I\’m thinking these days.  Not enough to totally cut them out of my life per say, more so enough to start keeping my distance.

Need a career change, been contemplating that for years now of course.  Hell I even went to school for something else and like most things took something away from it, lost interest and moved on.  Yet cooking is something that\’s stuck with me year after year and in light of my current job and the half ton of BS that it brings almost every single day I\’m about ready to snap…  I have no issues taking responsibility for my own actions, I always have and at my age most likely will continue to do so.  However to blatantly tell me that I haven\’t done this that or the other thing when you fucking well seen ME DOING IT 2 DAYS PRIOR really, really, really pisses me off!  Among a million other things, like ASSUMING I\’m being defiant because your simply not intelligent enough to realize any other conclusion, or even better God forbid admit that YOU are in fact the one who\’s wrong…  I\’m 31 not 15, defiance is something that left my life a LONG time ago…  This is real life, not high school!

Here\’s how I see it: First off you tell me not to do this that and the other thing yet expect me to assume responsibility anyway?  That\’s a huge WTF on my list of things I can\’t currently stand.  Also don\’t sit there and tell me that you want me to use \”your\” recipes when in fact you don\’t A: Have any of your own, you rely on Betty Crocker\’s cook book that was published before I was even born.   B: When you actually DO provide them they\’re incomplete and missing crucial steps leaving me no option but to improvise. C. Have NO background in culinary what so ever!

Who\’s the one who went to culinary school, not cooking school but actual culinary school oh yeah that would be ME not YOU.  Who\’s the one who has the background in international foods, nutritional sciences and what not once again that would be ME and not YOU so you can go fuck yourself!  I could sit here and write pages upon pages of things that quite simply piss me off about that current situation but I won\’t.  What I am going to do however is start documenting every single damn thing I do while there so the next time I hear you didn\’t do this, that or the other thing I can call your ass on it!  I think when it comes to the point that I would rather get a Brazilian wax EVERY day for the rest of my life & attempt to scrape off my tattoos with heavy grit sandpaper then go to work its time for me to move on…

*end rant*

In other news, I painted my bathroom again.  So I can officially say that I have in fact painted every single room in my apartment twice with the exception of my bedroom.  That thankfully only got painted once, there\’s too much big stuff in here to be moved around to do that again.   When I moved in it was this tacky shade of baby blue which reminded me too much of the generic shade of blue that is associated all too often with baby boys.  Not only that, it had finding Nemo wall paper cut-outs liquid cemented to the wall!  I mean seriously who does that?  I had to use an old Chef knife to scrape them off the wall and had to plaster over that before I painted.  So anyway my bathroom used to be pale yellow and for the most part I liked it.  Then I started noticing little things that were inadvertently driving me nuts and thought I had some paint left over which I did but it was the wrong hue!  That\’s the downfall to making your own custom colors which I do often yet when you run out of paint your essentially screwed.

So I trekked off to home depot because I decided it was high time for a change anyway.  Had to buy special primer because it was oil based paint that I used and since the question has in fact been asked a million times yes you CAN cover over oil based paint with latex under the following circumstances: Either you need to buy a primer that is specifically engineered for both types of paint.  They do exist but they\’re not all created equal so read the damn can!  I personally bought zinsser bulls eye 1-2-3 latex primer which had awesome coverage and could be tinted but I didn\’t bother since I wanted to paint the ceiling as well which I left white.  Or you need to sand down your walls first with low grit sandpaper to take off the sheen left by oil based paint because its a harder substance and has no flexibility unlike acrylic latex does (in any case I did both, its a small room and I wanted no margin of error).  And anyone who says you can\’t put oil over latex is a moron, I\’ve done it a hundred times with no problem.

I\’m pretty picky about color and I find for the most part that paint is grossly over-priced and since I don\’t own this place I really have no interest in spending a ton of money on paint and related supplies.  Behr does have exceptional paint but at almost $40.00 a gallon its more then I\’m willing to spend on a rental.  However if you buy lower quality paint, your color options are generally limited and that\’s when I go seek out the oops paint section and see what I can manipulate to my needs which generally works out pretty well in my favor (with the exception of one time).  Until I discovered recycled paint!  This stuff is AWESOME!  Its made by boomerang and its exceptionally affordable too ($12.00/gallon)  not to mention better for the environment as well.  It does have its limitations since it doesn\’t come in pure white (but close) so you can\’t tint it to suit your needs you pretty much pick a color and go with it.  I had my doubts when I bought a gallon to paint my living room but I figured that the cost was so minimal that it was worth trying out.  Thankfully I wasn\’t dissapointed since 2 gallons (1 was white from another company) and this paint which was much too dark out of the can itself and I made it lighter myself I was able to paint my living room, and the hallway and still have plenty left over for touch ups and such I was quite pleased.  So I decided since my living room is various shades of \”shore\” (which out of the can dries to the color of almost milk chocolate) I wanted to stay somewhat neutral and decided to go with \”moss\” knowing that it would dry darker since the color magnifies itself once on the walls.  I liked foliage too but I had a sneaking suspicion that it would be far too dark and since it is my bathroom I didn\’t want it to appear the size of a closet.   So now its a lovely shade of sage-esque green and I quite like it.  Except now I have to go out and buy new decorative touches for my bathroom since my shower curtain is very similar in color it appears to match a little too much for my own personal tastes.   Needs a third coat though since the color underneath it was a little on the bright side and I want to ensure total coverage.  Its not a huge space though so it takes almost no time at all to paint.  So yes Ania, I will finally post pictures!  Seeing as how I *think* I finally have this place looking the way that I would like it to look 🙂

I <3 HSV-1...

OK actually no I don\’t as a matter of fact its a pain in my ass!  OK herpes (simplex one) sounds a million times worse then it could be as in HSV-2 (genital herpes) If your really feeling up to viewing some images, well those can be found here.

Why on earth am I talking about herpes for?  Simple, because I have HSV-1 *(as does most of the population) which is nothing more then a cold sore that I didn\’t even know that I had until my student dentist pointed it out.  Because I went to start my dental treatment at McGill today, took the afternoon off of work and lo and behold I couldn\’t GET ANY WORK DONE!  Thankfully this ISN\’T a regular occurrence, I think the last time I had one was a few years ago.   So now I have to call the poor guy back when its gone urgh!  Because the little bastard can spread like wildfire and while I am anything BUT impressed with it taking up residence on my face its not very visible.  I guess its a good thing I don\’t go running around kissing people or giving out blow jobs eh?  I\’ll tell you though, great way to turn guys off apparently!  Ahem thanks…  That was nothing short of awesome as in someone falling off the face of the planet the minute I told them.  Hey could be worse, I could have confessed that I had genital herpes which I am pretty damn thankful that I DON\’T YAY negative blood tests!

Speaking of blow jobs…  Someone e-mailed this to me this morning and while I don\’t see how it has anything to do with the actual product at hand its the innuendo that made me laugh to a certain degree…  Especially the commentary about the video itself.  Then of course there\’s this one too which is more tasteful but still slightly inappropriate . One needs to wonder if that company was doing an ad campaign for pearl necklaces O.o!  Yeah I went there…  As for what I happen to think is flat out wrong oddly enough is this.  That\’s likely because I dislike fast food but I especially hate burger king (and small children)!  Here\’s an interesting twist on the gender role of things…  Sometimes I do love the internet! 😉

More reasons I love the internet (goes to show you my friends who send me this stuff have FAR too much time on their hands):
Breastfeeding dolls (I totally had a WTF moment) but the fox commentary is amusing.
My ALL TIME favorite condom commercial EVER! Which was banned, why I\’ll never know because it reins supreme in hilarity!
Learn English?

More of course can be found here (thanks Ben)
Offensive?  Maybe to some, thoughts?
OK so I happen to think that Kayne West is an EPIC douchetard… Apparently I\’m not the only one! Micheal sent these to me so of course I feel the need to pass it on 😉 How many people can relate to this

OK so enough with the random nonsense.   At least for the time being…
In other news, work is still mega fucking slow so I\’m either a looking for a new job that pays more/gives me more hours *or* finding some BS part time job until things pick up at my work. Because I\’m going to start accumulating some hardcore debt if this keeps up…
One thing I noticed was most ad\’s that were in conjunction with my line of work, they always referred to the person they were looking for as a male IE: Him, He and so on. WTF? Sexist much holy fuck! I\’m not some radical feminist or something but come on! I\’ve been in this industry since I was 14, its woman like me who stuck it out amongst the gender BS who helped pave the way for woman Chefs today thank you very much!

On a final note its almost Friday:

Taken from facebook
BENEFIT SHOW @ CLYDES SEPT 18TH
because everyone loves animals and beer
WHERE: CLYDES 286 Lakeshore blvd (Pointe claire)
WHEN: SEPTEMBER 18TH
WHY:

3 bands that rock are coming together on September 18th to play a benefit show for Secours Reach for the Stars Animal Rescue. SO, put on your fuckin green hat and get ready to hear some great bands play for an awesome cause!! Hope to see you there!

DO US PART

INSIDE RIOT

+GUESTS

5 BUCKS AT THE DOOR!

If anyone wants more information about Reach for the Stars Rescue & how you can help out, foster or adopt, feel free to contact me or visit this website:
INVITE ALL YOUR FRIENDS 🙂

Clydes is on the 211 bus route. You can catch the 211 from Lionel Groulx metro station, stay on past the Dorval Circle and get off right by Clyde\’S in Pointe Claire Village at a stop on deLourdes by the corner of the Lakeshore.
For those who are driving you take the 20 to the Cartier exit and continue down to the Lakeshore and hang a right. Clydes is only a block or two from the corner and there is a parking lot.