Its 10:00am, I just had cheesecake for breakfast. Don\’t judge me!
I thought I deserved a little self indulgence. I\’m sick, as in dear God someone please kill me now sick. No one\’s taking up my offers to run me over though damn you! I blame him, him as in I was going to see you Wed but your still sick and now i\’m sick, him. Granted I work at a daycare where runny noses are always in abundance but I\’m the Chef, not an educator so I rarely interact with the little ones very often. There\’s a reason for that. I had managed to stave off anything that was in fact going around the daycare, but then he was sick and we were making out in the museum on Saturday. Sigh
God damn him and all his yummy-ness!
In other news, I had a shift last night at COC that no one mentioned to me. Fabulous! Had it not been payday on Thursday (hooray!) and had I not contemplated taking Maximus primes Sunday shift I would have had no freaking clue. That is until D-rock would have called me & been \”hey Steph, where the fuck are you?\” I thought about stabbing myself so I could go home early but my morals got the best of me and thought it would be best to stick it out with the new guy. That\’s OK because new guy got one hell of a dose of Steph that he\’s not likely to forget anytime soon *smirk* heh… I\’d write about it but i\’m currently stoned on cold medication and i\’m lazy. Besides it was more like one of those you had to be there moments.
Anyhow moving along…
A while ago I briefly mentioned biting the bullet and contacting Jason\’s family(among other things). Which I was hesitant to do because I don\’t know them, therefore they sure as hell don\’t know how I am either. Grief is a funny thing & we all deal with it differently & for me its also a private matter. OK well not too private since I\’ve been blogging about it from the get go but still. I just know how much it hurt me personally and I couldn\’t begin to fathom how his mother would feel. So one night at work a co-worker and myself were talking about Jason and he brother who sadly met the same demise in a similar fashion. She made me feel better by saying that her mom loved hearing from anyone who knew her bother. Its almost April and I was starting to wonder if my letter (yes I wrote typed out a letter and mailed it the old fashioned way) reached its destination or not. Although I remember Jason telling me that it was a small town and well the mail service sucks, not to mention its in another country.
I came home in between jobs yesterday to feed the kids and decided to check my e-mail. There was two in there from the same person, one containing pictures & another one where the subject line: Thank you for the beautiful letter. I didn\’t recognize the name & at first I thought it was spam but I opened it and sure enough, it was from Jason\’s mom. I was floored, but happy that it had arrived safely! I was also pretty happy that she wholly supports what I aim to do which is amazing 🙂 I quote:\” And I think, too, that if his death brings people together who can change even one other life in this world, there is new beauty and hope.\” I totally agree! So that simple gesture made me feel 100 times better about the situation as a whole. Not just his foundation, but the grief I\’ve been experiencing in general. What she wrote just made everything seem OK for the first time since it happened.
Which is amazing and perhaps what I needed all along, so thank you for that.