Category Archives: Deep thoughts with Steph

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Where I\’ve been & where i\’m going…

It\’s been a really long time since I blogged.

Mostly because I associated my blog (and anything computer related for that matter) with smoking.  I can proudly say that I have NOT had a cigarette since about 10:30 pm on Sunday July 15th 2012.  The day before my grandfather\’s birthday, a man who coincidentally enough died of lung cancer.  I had to make some major lifestyle changes due to my hours being cut back at work, which resulted in an obvious loss of income and that was one of them.

Quitting smoking was one of the hardest things I have ever done for myself but I couldn\’t be happier that I did!  They say that everything happens for a reason and something good came out of having my hours scaled back.  That was probably the only thing but it\’s better than nothing.  Which is funny because everyone kept telling me \”think of the money you\’ll save\” when in reality my hours had been literally cut in half and I had to choose between smoking or eating and paying my rent.

I\’ve also partaken a greater interest in photography.  It affords me a different artistic outlet and I have found all kinds of helpful and lovely people on google +   it\’s where all the cool kids hang out.  I haven\’t really utilized it in any other way except for some light social interaction, but mostly photography.  I also decided to embark on the Google+ 365 self portrait project.   it\’s an interesting challenge and you can follow my own personal journey (that started yesterday) here

I started making jewelry and stuff and opened a store on Etsy, which you can find here  eventually I need to investigate sharing my Etsy store with Kristina who makes these AWESOME sock monsters and monkeys.  You should check her out on facebook  and tell her Steph sent you. 🙂

I\’m starting to get tired and going to wrap this up, but this is what\’s noteworthy in 2012 for me at least:

  • Photography.  Lot\’s and lot\’s of it!  Follow me on google plus if you like to see some of what I do.
  • Travel. I haven\’t gone anywhere exciting, just home.  More than I usually do.
  • Got myself a boyfriend.  He lives with me.  It\’s kind of nice actually and a little scary all at the same time.
  • Still chugging away at my sleeve, so not much new on the tattoo front.
  • The new manfriend is vegan so I\’ve been expanding my culinary horizons and eating better in the process.  I was mostly vegetarian/Pescetarian before he came along and i\’m OK with that.  I\’m not going to become vegan for him.  Besides I like Bacon and cheese too much, even if I only eat bacon once or twice a year.
  • More charity/volunteer work.  Not just for my own foundation but others.  It\’s nice actually!  Especially when you get to partake in projects such as the plus one collection .  Not only do you get your work published, you get it published alongside the people you admire the most and it\’s for charity too, which is pretty bad ass.
  • I\’ve been working a lot more on being true to myself.  It\’s been tough in some regards because even though I don\’t entirely care what most people think about me overall, sometimes it\’s good to have people in your corner just the same.
  • I started working out more.  It\’s proven to be not as impossible as I thought to get up before the sun rises and work up a sweat.

I\’m busy and content.  Which is all that really matters I think 🙂

 

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2012 Review

Hello blog, it\’s been a long time.

1. What did you do in 2012 that you’d never done before?

Took a trip on the train

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I don’t do new year’s resolutions anymore because I always break them.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Several people did

4. Did anyone close to you die?

My grandmother

5. What countries did you visit?

N/A

6. What would you like to have in 2013 that you lacked in 2012?

A flourishing business. More tattoos. Less poverty.

7. What dates from 2012 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

July 15th The day I quit smoking

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Quitting smoking.

9. What was your biggest failure?

Communication.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

Nothing major

11. What was the best thing you bought?

A Christmas tree.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

Mine.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

Pete

14. Where did most of your money go?

Rent, food.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Seeing my mom.

16. What song will always remind you of 2012?

Blow me (one last kiss) Pink

17. Compared to this time last year, are you: a) happier or sadder? b) thinner or fatter? c) richer or poorer?

Happier, fatter (due to quitting smoking), poorer

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?

Worked a little more.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?

Stress out. Get angry. Eat candy.

20. How did you spend Christmas?

With my family, same as I do every year.

21. Did you fall in love in 2012?

I did and it\’s wonderful.

\"OLYMPUS

22. What was your favorite TV program?

Two broke girls & Whitney

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn\’t hate this time last year?

No.

24. What was the best book you read?

I\’ve read a lot of book through the year. I enjoyed them all.

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?

26. What did you want and get?

More time at work, more tattoos and someone to spend my time with.

27. What did you want and not get?

Steadier income

28. What was your favorite film of this year?

Nothing stands out.

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I turned 34.  I chose not to do anything special this year but my co-workers made it special for me.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

Getting more work done on my tattoos!

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2010?

Same as usual: comfy casual.  I like simple, I don\’t do complicated.

32. What kept you sane?

Painting, photography, Nick, my kids at work.

33. What political issue stirred you the most?

Pauline M, the Quebec election and everything that it stood for.

34. Who did you miss?

Jason as I always do.

35. Who was the best new person you met?

Nick.

36. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2012.

Do what makes you happy.

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That heart stopping moment when you reach for a lid, in the dark & come face to face with a flamingo-at work.

Yes that really did happen, but that\’s a story for another day…  I\’ll just leave you wondering why on earth there\’s a flamingo at the daycare I work at.

In other news, there\’s a vibrator museum. Really. No i\’m not providing you with the link. I\’ll just leave you to ponder how I know this, along with that whole flamingo thing.

In all seriousness though, I have gotten e-mails inquiring about the last post that I wrote. I\’m OK. Really. What I did there was just something I felt the need to do, it was a long time coming. I just finally got off my ass and did it. Simple as that.  So fear not, I\’m doing pretty good for myself these days.  With the exception of my head.  Post concussion syndrome anyone?  Trip to the neurologist to make sure that everything is OK and I don\’t end up on strange and unusual deaths due to smashing the back of my head into a cupboard? Working on it. So yeah.  Been thinking a lot lately about how people assume, presume and otherwise take certain things and end up misconstrued…  

So I ask questions, even if I run the risk of looking completely and utterly stupid. Because at the end of the day, at least I don\’t look like an ass because I assumed something.  Even if it is a little irritating.  Anyway I\’ve been thinking of someone a lot these days, someone who\’s not a part of my life anymore and hasn\’t been for a long time.  Not so much them, more so the crushed look on their face when they claimed that I was getting too attached to them (when in reality, it was the other way around).  After I wiped the puzzled look off my face, I asked them why they felt that way (I have serious issues with co-dependence. I\’m not that way and I really don\’t much care for people who are that way), their response? You do all these nice things for me.

Come again?   

I really am a nice girl, and if doing what I normally do for pretty much everyone who crosses my path is of some issue to you, then so be it.

I believe that everything happens for a reason and people come into your life for a reason.
For the most part, I treat people the same. I am an equal opportunity person and if I truly can\’t stand you, yet am still reasonably respectful to you, it\’s because i\’m paid to.

Otherwise I\’ll do nice things. Like make you dinner. Because i\’m a Chef, feeding people is what I do and also? I\’m a huge nerd, so in some random way you\’ve become my guinea pig/taste tester. So it\’s somewhat infuritating when people (usually guys) assume that I want to fuck them because I made them dinner.

I felt kind of bad when I told him that I didn\’t treat him any differently than I did anyone else.  Mostly because he looked crushed.  We were just FWB, so to me your the friend I have that\’s not only seen my naughty bits, but also my sex face.  In the end, it turns out he was in love with me.

Somehow that\’s my fault? 

Bottom line and the most central point to this post?

Don\’t make assumptions. Ever.

Because not only will you end up looking like an ass, it will also bite you in the ass.

Assume nothing, question everything. Even if it makes you look a few brain cells short (which I apparently am these days)/

 

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Reasons why I most likely won\’t date you.

Also? I hate my phone. A lot. Smart phone my ass. Sometimes it sends e-mails, usually it chooses not to. Although on the rare occasion that it does, it usually cuts it off at some point. Which is irritating as fuck because sending e-mail via this phone is already enough of a pain in the ass! -End phone rant.

Anyway, someone had commented that I hadn\’t posted any bad dates as of late. The reason behind that would be this: I haven\’t been on any dates of late. Good, bad or otherwise. Things are finally kinda quiet in my life and well needless to say, I\’m enjoying the \’me\’ time that comes along with it.  Aside from the fact that I\’ve been deathly ill and have decided to keep my germs to myself for the most part.  I\’m also really, really picky about who I choose to spend my time with.  With the sheer number of douchebags out there, who can blame me?  That being said, here\’s my (on going) list of things that will make me likely say no to you if you ask me out on a date:

  • You feel compelled to show me your 6-8 pack.  Unless it\’s beer or some other tasty beverage, I really don\’t give a shit about how ripped your core is. Really, I don\’t.
  • You send me pictures of your naughty bits.  *IF* I wanted to see that, I would make it happen. If for some reason you truly feel that this is necessary, even if I don\’t, make it a good one.  Likely won\’t change my mind in any way, shape or form; however make my free eye candy worth it and hope that I don\’t have some underground porn site.
  • You wear more make up than I do. I\’m all for being who you are and all that, I just fail to see the attraction to eye liner.
  • You\’re high maintenance. Guys complain that it takes woman eons to get ready. I dated a guy once who took twice as long to get ready. Yes really.
  • You feel compelled to wear your pants hanging halfway off your ass. IT\’S NOT ATTRACTIVE!   AS A MATTER OF FACT, YOU LOOK LIKE A FUCKING IDIOT! 
  • Pointy shoes. I just can\’t deal with this horrendous trend in shoes. As soon as I see them, I feel the need to put bells on them and throw you in a parade with the shriners.
  • You live at home. I\’m almost 34, if you\’re still living at home, you\’re too young for me. Or you\’re a mamma\’s boy and I can\’t handle that either.
  • You go out of your way to tell me how much money you make or the kind of car you drive. I. Don\’t. Care.
  • You play the oral sex card.  Just because guys claim that they\’re hurting for oral sex doesn\’t mean that we are. Talk is cheap and unless you\’re so damn good that it\’s mind blowing,  would make me hit the ceiling good and can prove it; shut it. Don\’t sing it, bring it.
  • You can\’t spell or type like a lazy ass fool. I\’m very well read, nothing irks me more than someone who can\’t spell or can\’t be bothered to spell out the entire word. It\’s lazy and too much like elementary school. Grow up.
  • You lack intellect. I shouldn\’t have to explain that.
  • You can\’t hold a conversation. Communication is important.
  • You\’re an idiot. I\’m smart. Book/life/street smart. You should be too on some level or another. Otherwise the likely hood of us having any type of connection is highly improbable. I don\’t care if I sound like a snob, intelligence is hot.
  • You\’re considerably shorter than I am.  I\’m almost 6 feet tall, I\’m also not a jungle gym.
  • You\’re in a relationship. I don\’t care if your wife/girlfriend/significant other isn\’t doing it for you.  Find a fuck friend or five to meet your needs. I don\’t share, nor do I tolerate cheating.
  • Don\’t have a sense of humor. I don\’t deal with people who are uptight.
  • Feel the need to text/email/phone me several times a day for no reason at all. It\’s irritating.
  • Have zero respect for my independence. I take care of me. Deal with it.
  • Have mommy issues. Freud just may have been onto something…
  • You tell me that you want to lick all of my tattoos. No. Just no.
  • You feel the need to pee on me. I have indoor plumbing. Please, feel free to use it.
  • You masturbate in my bathroom. Yes it\’s happened before. How did I find out? They missed. I have a black shower curtain. Do the math.
  • You want kids. I don\’t. That\’s an immediate deal breaker right there.