Category Archives: Deep thoughts with Steph

by

I want to be a pyro tech

Seriously, how awesome would that be? Playing with fireworks and getting paid for it! Take a moment and consider the bad ass factor.

In other news, one of these days I\’ll learn that sleeping with my hair down is a bad idea:

\"\"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This picture fails to capture what a ridiculous mess my hair is.  It looks like I\’ve had ridiculously awesome sex all night and had that been the case, it would have been worth the effort it\’s going to take to un-tangle this disaster. But no. That\’s a direct result of my tossing and turning all night in spite of getting high off my ass.  You\’d think i\’d sleep better, but no.

In other news, it was Jason\’s birthday yesterday. He would have been 32. He hated holidays in general and didn\’t like anyone making a big deal out of his birthday. My whole argument (when he was alive) was that had it not been for his birthday, we never would have met.  His birthday didn\’t suck as much as it usually does, I guess time really does heal everything.  In any case, I smoked a joint in his honor. I\’m sure he\’d appreciate that.  Which is exactly what  i\’m going to do when I get his ashes in the mail.

Yep, you just read that right.  The original plan was to have Jason\’s mom arrive with Jason\’s urn (or whatever he\’s currently stashed in), come to Canada and we were going to scatter his ashes along the peninsula in St. Anne\’s. Although knowing our luck it would have have been really windy that day and there would have been a ton of people out on their boats; which might have ended up in a disaster.  Especially if people were out sunbathing and covered in oil. Yeah it\’s morbid, but also kind of funny. Really. Think about it.

Funny unless you\’re the one who gets smothered by someone\’s ashes of course.    

I have a good relationship with Jason\’s mom. One that I\’m thankful for. So I thought that when the time came for her to scatter Jason\’s ashes, knowing full well that neither of us could come up with the $1500.00 for airfare; I\’d ask her to send some to me so I could do it on our behalf.  I didn\’t mention it, I wanted to wait until she was good and ready to part with his cremains before I said anything. A few weeks ago she mentioned that she was going to do it soon. I was hesitant to ask since it\’s a strange and rather personal request to ask of someone and possibly strange to some. Turns out that she wanted to ask me if I wanted some but didn\’t want me to be creeped out by it.  I\’m happy I asked and thrilled that she agreed that it was a nice idea.  Apparently she scattered his ashes yesterday at one of his favorite places, being his birthday and all. She promised to save me some so I could say good bye and hopefully get some closure once and for all.

I am however having a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that my close friends ashes will eventually show up in my mailbox in a Ziploc bag.  

 

by

Life lessons, Culinary style.

When I was in high school, we had to write a credo for English class. Mine was titled: Everything I learned in life, I learned the hard way. I was a freaking teenager, what the fuck did I know?  Mind you, I had been dealt my fair share of shit in life at that point. However, looking back perspective and hindsight change everything.

I read a post by the lovely Lindsay  and I get it & I dig it. It wouldn\’t make sense to just anyone. Why? Because being a woman in a kitchen is a special kind of hell.  Although sometimes it doesn\’t always suck and this post reminded me of that.  While I met Lindsay during her stint at Concordia, we also worked together briefly. We played together in the kitchen once or twice at said job. In any case, it sometimes astounds me just how much my career has shaped me into the person I am.  Starting almost 20 years ago I got a job at Preston Pizza and that\’s where it all started…

Since then working in the restaurant industry has taught me a lot about life in general, never mind cooking. Such as:

  • How to have balls. Metaphorical one\’s.
  • How much guys are utterly full of shit and bravado.
  • How to be a complete and utter pervert.  Really, I\’m such a pig 😀
  • How to fix the most random shit. Chef\’s can fix just about anything.
  • That kick ass panties are pretty much the only reminder that you have left of being an actual woman.
  • Most restaurant owners are cheap, grabby perv\’s.
  • Adrenaline is your best friend.
  • Not matter how many injuries you have, you suck it up and still work your ass off.
  • Even though you think that you have nothing left, somehow, someway you manage to drag your ass through your shift.
  • Free beer isn\’t so free.
  • When it\’s appropriate to yell, scream and swear. Not cry. Ever.
  • When you hear you can\’t, you give them the finger and say:\”Fuck you! I can and I will\” And I did just that.
  • Humility. When to have it and when not to bother.
  • Patience. Lot\’s and lot\’s of patience.
  • That the higher end the place, the more people think it\’s burger king. I got news for you: You can\’t have it your way.

Among countless other things.

Sometimes I miss working on a line. Likely because I currently have a head injury but I miss the camaraderie.  As much as being a lone female among a bunch of testosterone fueled idiots sucks ass, it did have it\’s perks.  I found that guys who were threatened by yours truly were likely horribly inadequate in other ways.  I\’ve worked with my share of pansy ass bitches and upstaged my share of men.  I\’ve heard countless times that because i\’m a woman I would never make it in a kitchen and being a bitchy teenager, with something to prove; I became a Chef just to spite them all.  It added fuel to my fire and I found that most guys respected you for it, even if they secretly hated you for it.  Now that I work with an all female staff, I also discovered that I prefer working with a bunch of smelly dudes.  In spite of all the trials and tribulations that comes along with working in that kind of environment I have learned the kind of men that I don\’t want in my life and the one\’s that I do.

Even though being a Chef has fucked with me somewhat on an emotional level, I\’ve developed a thick skin. I can take criticism like a champ, and cook some bad ass food while I\’m at it.  The downfall of it all? Being a Chef sucks the girl right out of you.


\"\"

 

 

 

by

A Message by George Carlin:

The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers,
wider Freeways , but narrower viewpoints.
We spend more, but have less,
we buy more, but enjoy less.
We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time.
We have more degrees but less sense,
more knowledge, but less judgment,
more experts, yet more problems,
more medicine, but less wellness.

We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry,
stay up too late, get up too tired,
read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom.

We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values.
We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.

We\’ve learned how to make a living, but not a life.
We\’ve added years to life not life to years.
We\’ve been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor.
We conquered outer space but not inner space.
We\’ve done larger things, but not better things.

We\’ve cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul.
We\’ve conquered the atom, but not our prejudice.
We write more, but learn less.
We plan more, but accomplish less.
We\’ve learned to rush, but not to wait.
We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less.

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion,
big men and small character,
steep profits and shallow relationships.
These are the days of two incomes but more divorce,
fancier houses, but broken homes.
These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill.
It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom.
A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit delete…

Remember;
spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever.

Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side.

Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn\’t cost a cent.

Remember, to say, \’I love you\’ to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you.

Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again.

Give time to love, give time to speak! And give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind.

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

by

I\’m offensive.

Apparently.

Clearly, some people in this world simply can not handle my frank level of honesty.  In today\’s society, we\’re far too sanitized!  Everyone is too fucking scared to truly speak their mind for fear of offending someone or something.

Except for me that is.  

Here\’s the bottom line: chances are I\’m saying exactly what you yourself are thinking, but lack the balls to say.  I don\’t go out of my way to be offensive (believe it or not, stop snickering!) and I also posses the ability to keep my mouth shut when the situation calls for it & occasionally posses the ability to be tactful.  However I refuse to sit there and not speak up because I\’m afraid that you\’ll be offended.  If you\’re entitled to an opinion, why aren\’t I?  Why is it that I am expected to be respectful of your opinions, thoughts and beliefs but you can\’t find it within yourself to be respectful of mine.

The bottom line?

I speak my mind because it hurts to bite my tongue.

Religion and politics are always two hot button topics.
Especially the catholic religion…

\"\"

Images like this, among countless others exist for a reason.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Now don\’t get me wrong, I\’m NOT hating on anyone\’s belief\’s. Nor am I saying that this is a universal opinion of anyone who chooses to partake in organized religion either.  I\’m very curious and respectful of anyone\’s cultural/religious belief\’s and often make inquires to such.  Whatever brings you hope or comfort, get\’s you through the day is OK by me.  More often than not, I enjoy these conversations.  Some of the rituals surrounding various cultures and religions are not only thought provoking, but symbolic in a heart felt way.  I\’m very fortunate to be friends and work with people who are various cultures and religions and they are very patient when it comes to indulging my curiosity and I love them for it!

I\’m technically a Roman Catholic.  I\’ve since denounced my religion and prefer to refer to myself as a non denominational person if asked.  I\’m sure that my nannies are spinning in their graves (sorry nannies, I love you and no disrespect!).  I have my own set of belief\’s that I choose to keep to myself.  Because really, it\’s of no concern to anyone but myself.  That brings me forth to today.  I was in the middle of a discussion with someone in regards to lent   and how they felt that they needed to do something more challenging next year.  To which I commented: \’I gave up on that years ago, I can\’t be bothered with Catholicism anymore.\’ they sighed and replied \’that\’s often the case\’.

So I said, can you blame them? The Catholic religion is FULL of hypocrisy and I went on to say that the pope is a douche-bag and priests are running around raping alter boys yet the pope is more concerned about gay marriage and how it\’s \’not sanctioned\’ sodomy is wrong and no birth control or abortions for you!  It\’s appalling that when someone dies, a child is born with hideous deformities ( and the list goes on) that the die hard\’s always say: It\’s God\’s way. OK well what if my child was born gay, since God allegedly created us all than why in the fuck is it so wrong? By wrong I mean in the eyes of the fanatics.

I wholly support the gay community 100% by the way.  I always have and that\’s NOT going to change anytime soon.

All of which really pissed the person I was talking to off.  They fired back with:\”That\’s not a global opinion Steph\” and they\’re right. It\’s not.  It is however *my* opinion, to which I believe I am more than entitled to! To which I said, I know that.  I however choose not to embark on a path that clearly supports hypocritical nonsense.  To which they said they were offended by my use of the word nonsense.  I\’m not talking about your run of the mill nonsense, I\’m talking about HYPOCRITICAL nonsense, to which there is a difference. At least in my point of view. It\’s my blog, so I don\’t give a shit if you don\’t agree.

It also explains why this person is such an opinionated hypocrite themselves.

They themselves have a child, one who was conceived out of wedlock.  Which in the eyes of the catholic church, makes that child a bastard.  Also sex before marriage? That\’s a big no no too!  What if said child is gay? Oh shit, heads are going to roll.

ROLL PEOPLE!  

So I offended this person once again.  Seems to happen a lot. Not that I give a shit, I\’m not going to change who I am just because someone has a problem with it. I don\’t give a shit if you like me or not to be honest.  However, respect is a two way street. As I said before, I respect everyone\’s right to believe in what they choose, to worship who/where they please.  Doesn\’t mean I have to like your point of view, nor are you required to like mine.

I however, at least respect you and what you believe in regardless and I don\’t take offense to your inability to give me the same courtesy. 

I can not with a clear conscious partake in a religion that tells me I can\’t:

  • Have sex before I\’m married. The hell you say! You wouldn\’t buy a car without test driving it first would you?
  • Practice birth control.  Fuck you, I don\’t want kids.
  • Get tattooed.  They say the body is a temple and blah fucking blah. However, one should take into consideration how ornate and decorative temples are. Think about that for a second. I\’m doing the same, just to MY body.
  • Abortion is wrong. Yet another hot button topic, clearly. However I believe in the right to choose, dependent upon the circumstances. I don\’t feel that abortion should be used as a form of birth control. However if circumstances should dictate my not wanting to give birth IE: being raped, cases of incest, my health/welfare to be horribly compromised to name a few, than DAMN RIGHT I will have an abortion.
  • Because God said so.  A lovely catch all. Or it\’s written in the scripture. Ridiculous. Lot\’s of other religions utilize the same bible and scriptures.

Just a few reasons of my own choosing really.  Don\’t get me started on all the cases of rape taking place within Catholic institutions!  Blows. My. Mind.  When is the Vatican going to step up and acknowledge that celibacy is CLEARLY not the answer when some of the men who represent your churches are committing sins set forth in the bible and traumatizing children?

So when it comes to religious beliefs, I freely acknowledge all of them and choose to embrace the one\’s of my choosing. Because that\’s my right. Very much like my opinion. So don\’t you dare call me offensive simply because I don\’t agree with the religion you choose to partake in.

\"\"

\’nuff said

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I await your hate mail.  I LOVE hate mail!  Allow me to make it easy for you:

talesfromthebathroomstall@gmail.com

Bring it on bitches! 😉